


The Fear of Goodbye

by Madiedoodle



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky is going to war and he didn't tell Steve, M/M, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, confession through letter, the handy russian neighbor saves the day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 12:47:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5128181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madiedoodle/pseuds/Madiedoodle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky left Steve with nothing but a goodbye letter, and Steve's too stubborn to just take that(with a little help from a psychic neighbor lady)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Fear of Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Another prompt from an anon, giving me pieces from the letter that Bucky left for Steve.

Steve sat, hands shaking as he re-read the letter, praying that he had read it wrong.

‘Dear Steve,

I’m sorry that I couldn’t do this in person, but I wouldn’t have been able to leave if had waited. You deserve better than this pathetic proclamation, but it has to be said. I have to leave, and maybe that’s for the best.... You deserve better, so much better than me. I am the luckiest man to have known you, and I hope that by leaving you can find someone who deserves you. Someone who can be your stars, your moon, your earth, your entire galaxy, and someone who loves you as much as I do. I will hope til my last breathe that you find someone who deserves you, and that you live to be happy. 

Love,

Bucky’

With this short note Steve was shattered. Bucky was gone, off to war without even a proper goodbye, without even telling Steve. He could imagine Bucky, hunched over the table, trying to finish before Steve woke up, before he had to be faced with saying goodbye. It was a tragic thought, and Steve could feel his lungs closing up as his emotions tried to overwhelm him. 

It was all so stupid, so poetic, so BUCKY, that Steve could almost laugh if he wasn’t so sad. 

Knocking on the door interupted his thoughts, and he opened the door to find the hunched form of Mrs. Zolnerowich. Her steely gaze made him stand straighter, a feeling that he got whenever they met. She looked him over once, before opening her arms for a hug. 

“I saw your boy leave, malyutka, not too long ago. Off to war, I take it.”she said, and Steve nodded into her shoulder, fighting to stop shaking like a leaf in her arms. 

“He left me a letter, didn’t even say goodbye.” he said hoarsely, and she huffed, letting him go and wrapping a scarf around his neck. 

“What are you waiting for then? Go get him! The bus doesn’t leave for another fifteen minutes, go say goodbye!” she said pushing him out the door, and he laughed as she continued to shove him down the hallway. 

“Thank you Mrs. Zolnerowich!” he said as he began to make his way down the stairs, careful not to run as he tried to save his breathe to rush towards the bus stop. He would catch up with Bucky if it killed him, but that required actually managing to get there. 

He made it to the bus stop within eight minutes, just as Bucky was climbing onto the bus. 

“James Buchanan Barnes, how dare you leave without saying goodbye to your best pal.” he said, as much a shout as he could muster with the amount of air in his lungs. Luckily, Bucky heard him, turning his head and eyes widening in surprise as he stepped away from the bus. 

“Steve, what are you......how did you get here?” he said, and then noticed how red Steve was turning. “God, you little punk, you ran here? With your lungs? What the hell were you thinking?” he said, half shouting, and Steve shook his head. 

“I was thinkin’, that I deserve an actual goodbye, you jerk. Not some stupid confession letter before you go out to dodge bullets without me.” he said, and then Bucky wrapped him in a hug. 

“I’m sorry Stevie.” he whispered, and Steve pulled away.

“You had better be sorry, you didn’t even tell me that you’d been drafted! Who does that?! And then you just up and leave?” he said, before wrapping himself around Bucky again. “And now I’ve gotta tell you that I love you, and I can’t even kiss you because we’re in public. So you’d better come back Buck, do you hear me? You had better come back.” 

“I can’t promise Steve, but I’ll try my damned best.” he said, and Steve nodded, once again letting him go as Bucky stepped back, heading back towards the bus with one last, lazy salute to Steve. 

It’s not a goodbye, Steve told himself, folding the letter and putting it back into his pocket. This wasn’t the end of the line.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on a roll today and I'm actually writing. Send me prompts and ideas and I would love to write them out! And please do tell me what you think of this!


End file.
